Paranormal Thoughts....
A place for random thoughts, rambling, discussion, questions, controversy, venting, and possibly even some useful information!
Index:
Are You Going to Talk To These People
Where Did THAT Thought Come From? Seth?
Fear of Ghosts or Fear of the Living
Another Experience in My Parent's Home
Tell me again....WHY do we do this?
A New Spin on our Investigations...Proof?
If you can't say anything nice......
4/19/05
This is an event that actually happened with me and my son. It’s been on the back of my mind ever since it occurred and got me to thinking about some things. This occurred about a year ago. My son was six. He knows that I go out looking for ghosts but he hadn’t really ever been with me before. I picked him up from school one afternoon and I wanted to go out and look around in a cemetery that I would be investigating that night. It was in Wilmer, Texas where we lived at the time. My dog was in the car at the time as well. The three of us pulled just inside the cemetery gate and I put the car in park. It was just outside of town, no other houses to speak of, no dogs running around…it was just really quiet and peaceful looking.
A minute later, my dog started growling and the hair was standing straight up on her back. She started scratching at the window and continued barking and growling. I looked back at her in the back seat and my son also appeared to be looking at something out the same window. I scanned the cemetery and the area around for a squirrel or something else that she might be barking at but there was nothing there that I could see. I’d never seen her act like that! I decided to leave and head back home.
Later that night when I was getting ready to head back out to that cemetery for our investigation, my son asked, “ Are you going to talk to those people?” I was caught a little off-guard. “What people?” I asked him. That’s when he told me about the two women who walked up and stood by our car while we were in the cemetery. He is not one to make things up but I was still a little skeptical. We WERE in a cemetery and a child’s imagination is a wonderful thing. But then there was the dog too. Hmmm Something to think about anyway.
That night, we recorded two EVP. Most EVP are hard to understand, but these were not. I heard one say, “He saw us” and the other one said, “I like (your?) dog”. The ‘your’ was a little fuzzy, but you could plainly hear the other part. There were also two bright orbs in nearly every picture I took out there that night. (I have searched for these EVP recordings but then I remembered that I sent those tapes and pictures with the person who was with me. I’ve since moved to Abilene and have not been able to contact this person)
I know this sounds too crazy to be true, but I was there. I saw, I heard, and I believe that my son and my dog actually saw ‘something’ that I didn’t see with my own eyes.
I’ve always heard that kids and maybe dogs can see ghosts but you have to wonder why.
Is it because they don’t know that they shouldn’t be able to see them? Does it have to do with the development of the structures in their eyes? Maybe it’s both… or maybe its something else completely. But it makes me think about the innocence of our children and how closed-minded most of us as adult have become. There is more to this world than we can see. Having a science background, to me that is a fact. Whether it is energy, or ghosts, or light, or something else, we have learned somewhere along the way that we shouldn’t see these things. Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to open our minds to these things? Or would we want to see what was out there? I don’t know if I would or not…but it’s something to think about.
4/29/05
Have you ever wondered where those strange thoughts come from as you lay quietly trying to get to sleep at night? (or am I alone in this?) I mean, I have thoughts pop up in my head sometimes at night that I KNOW I wouldn't normally think of. They have absolutely nothing to do with anything related to my life. I've even been 'thinking' about a conversation that I'm not even having!!! It's like two people are talking in my mind and I am just an innocent bystander. Okay, before you call the people in the happy white coats....YET. Let me give you my thoughts on this. Some people say that this is when your mind is 'unwinding' from the day. Others think it is just random thoughts. BUT... a "thought" is something that YOU have.... right? And these things are NOT something that I am thinking of. They just pop into my head.
I'm not a psychologist.. there may very well be a perfectly logical explanation for this. But I read a book about a year called "Seth Speaks" that really got me thinking about these thoughts. This book was supposedly written by a spirit who spoke through a woman. She was just saying what he was telling or showing her to say. Her husband then wrote all of this stuff down and there you have it... "Seth Speaks" It was almost like she was 'possessed' for a short period of time. Anyway.... (I told you this is a site for rambling)... according to 'Seth', we exist sort of on parallel universes...we are just occupied by this one at this given moment. That's just one strange idea he gives us through this woman. He also tells us that there are spirit guides that are here to guide us through this life and that they come to us at night in our dreams when we aren't focused on the daily things in life. Sounds odd... but when I have these thoughts that don't seem to be mine, I wonder sometimes if there really are other dimensions or other spirits that we can pick up on when our minds are at rest.
If you think I'm nuts, try this tonight. As you are laying there quietly, try not to think about anything. Imagine a locked box in the top of the closet. Take it down, unlock it and open it up, then put each of your ideas, thoughts, and worries in the box. Then lock the box and put it in the closet. (that's a great way I have learned to relax at night) Once your mind is clear, pay attention to the thoughts in your mind. See if you don't have a similar experience. You might picture a person or a place you have never seen... you might hear a conversation that you aren't having. Give it a try. I'm curious to know if I'm the only crazy person out there!
5/6/05
It seems that more into the "paranormal" I get, the stranger my life gets. To the average person, including my own family, it would seem that I need some serious help. But I don't think they truly understand just how complex our lives are....there is sooo much more to our lives than we can ever comprehend at the level we are on. . Okay, I'll get to the point. I've always been interested in things like lucid dreaming (knowing you are dreaming and being able to go places and do unreal things willingly as you dream) and astral projection (pretty much the same thing... going to places in a meditative state or dream state). But here lately, I've really been doing a lot of reading about it. The concept of being able to "will" something into our physical lives is amazing as well. One year ago, I would have told you that this was all impossible. And if it were possible, I would have told you that there was no way that I, the totally normal, grounded person, would be able to do these things. But I'm starting to believe that I am capable of these things and have even started to notice them coming true. I've had dreams where I realize that I am dreaming, and then will myself to fly, travel to the other side of the world, and go make peace with a loved one who passed on years ago. It is an amazing experience! I don't do it all the time, it is taking a lot of practice and focus, but it is the most amazing experience!!!!
The strange thing that happened to me the other day: I had been reading about will power. The exercise that I had been working on was the classic thing where you try and make a piece of foil spin on top of a needle inside of a jar where the air couldn't move it. I had some spare time in my office at work and had been trying to WILL this silly thing to move for over an hour to no avail. I was beginning to believe that I really was insane to believe this stuff. Finally, it time for my class to start. This is finals week so I was giving tests to the students. It was quiet during the test until a lot of noise started out in the hallway. I thought several times..."I should go shut that door" but I waited awhile to do it because I was busy with something. One of the students finally asked me if I would shut the door so I turned toward the door and began to walk toward it. Immediately, it shut. Hmmmmmm.... okay... I passed that one off for someone in the hall doing it. Not a big deal. The test continued. Later, I realized that the lights had been dimmed a little the whole time the students were taking their test. I decided (for fun) to WILL the lights to come back up to full brightness. I didn't really expect anything to happen. That was ridiculous right????? Well as God is my witness, not a soul was near the light dimmer... as soon as I got up to head to the dimmer, the lights dimmed by themselves!!!!!!! I about came unglued!!! Wow.
Okay, maybe it was coincidence. Who's to know. But this incident gave me a boost in confidence about this whole 'will power' thing. According to what I've been reading... if we 'will' something strongly enough, we can manifest it in our physical lives. That is an unbelievable thought. If you think I'm insane, I don't blame you. But do some reading for yourself.... who knows. There really is probably more to life than we normally experience. As for me, I think I'll keep trying! A new house and a husband would be nice. Ha. :)
6/12/05
My brother brought up an interesting point the other day. This is a crazy world that we live in now days! Many people have asked me how I can go into a cemetery in the middle of the night, or go into an extremely haunted house and not ever be afraid. "Wouldn't you freak out if you saw a ghost?" Well, my answer to that is NO. I'm not afraid of the ghosts at all. A ghost can't hurt you... in 99% of the cases anyway. What AM I afraid of? Nothing really to the extreme... but I would be much more worried about those who are still on this rotating mass of earth than those who have passed on to a better place. Every day your turn on the TV and hear about another child being abducted or killed or murders, rapes, theft, arson, and other crimes. What kind of world is it that we can't even let our own children play outside for fear that they will be picked up by some whacked-out madman. It's getting insane!
I was heading out to go do an investigation at a residence that I had never been to and to meet a person I had never met before. Although we always investigate in groups, and we conduct our research under strict guidelines to protect the group and the validity of the data,.... you just never know. Before I left, my brother said, "You know, one of these days you are going to get a call from some psychopathic serial killer who wants you to come do an 'investigation' ". I thought about that for days! Ghost hunters are always meeting new people, and maybe I'm too trusting, but I had never thought about that really. I guess that is one risk that goes along with this job but it is also something that each group like ours should seriously consider! You can't take a gun into someone's house for protection....I don't think they would appreciate that, But don't fall into the trap of being an overly-trusting person and forget that there are some strange folks out there. Be careful! Trust your instincts, and NEVER go alone!
7/16/05
I've heard of shadow people, and I've experienced strange things in my parent's home since I was young. Being a ghost investigator, you usually HOPE for things to occur so that you can document it. But I don't think anyone is ever prepared for it to happen in your own home. I was house sitting for my parents last week and I wasn't feeling too well. It was around 3:00 am and I got out of bed and went into the kitchen and was sitting at the table reading a magazine. My son was still asleep in the back bedroom. As I was sitting there I saw a large, dark shadow cross the wall in the living room. The light was on in the bathroom, so a shadow like this would have only happened had somebody walked across the hallway in front of the bathroom door. At first I thought it was my son so I didn't think too much about it... but I did get up to make sure it was him. When I entered his bedroom, he was still sound asleep...even snoring! It wasn't him. I went back into the kitchen to finish what I was reading, but now I paid a little more attention to what was happening in the living room. There it was again.... this time going the other way across the wall. Now I put the magazine down and just watched the wall. I wanted to go grab my camera but I was honestly a little afraid to walk back through the house to the back room to get it. I don't know why.....I'm not afraid of ghosts, but this gave me a creepy feeling. About 10 minutes later, I heard a small girl and a small boy talking. I couldn't make out what they were saying, but it was unmistakably a conversation between two small children. Being a rational person, I first thought of the TV. My son must have woken up and turned on the cartoon or something. I got up to go check the TV in the back bedroom, and as I reached the door to go into the living room, I heard one of the voices say, "Shhhhhhh". I kept walking and checked the TV in the other rooms of the house... none of them were on and my son was still snoring. Since I was back there already, I grabbed my camera off the charger and went back into the kitchen. The camera had been charging for a couple of days. When I went to the door of the living room to take a picture, I turned the camera on... it came on, beeped at me, and turned off. The battery was dead.
I decided that whoever this was didn't want to be seen or heard so I went back in and slept in the same room as my son. Looking back now....HOW COOL!!!!! But that night, being alone in the house that I knew was haunted..... NOT so cool! I haven't heard or seen anything since then. I don't know if that was an actual shadow.. or what some would call a 'shadow person'... but it was definitely SOMETHING!
10/29/05
If I had a quarter for every time I've been asked, "Aren't you scared when you do an investigation?" I would be independently wealthy! My answer to that question was always the same. "No, there is nothing to be scared of...ghosts can't hurt you." Well, I would like to retract that statement. I will now answer that question with, "Yes, sometimes it can get pretty scary"! After an investigation about a month ago in Lexington Texas, I am convinced that ghosts CAN hurt you if they want to. We were called to investigate an old abandoned house in Lexington where there were some strange reports of voices, things moving, and some very negative feelings. There have been two people die in this house...an older lady and a young girl who was mentally ill. Immediately upon entering the house we were growled at by an unseen 'thing'. It sounded like an injured dog but we could not find anything like that in the house. We continued through the house, to the kitchen where the older lady was said to have died, and into several of the bedrooms of the house. One room in particular was very active. We were standing just inside the doorway of this room when we began to hear audible whispers even without our voice recorders. It was as if there was someone leaning over your shoulder and whispering right in your ear, yet we turned around and there was nobody there. Something on the other side of the room fell off of a shelf and hit the floor. I turned on my video camera and picked up some moving orbs and we were getting several EMF spikes and still orb photos as well. Cara, one of our investigators, reported that her hand was burning and when we looked at it, some unseen force scratched the top of her hand and literally drew blood. At this time we decided that whatever it was did NOT want us in this room so we turned to go. The last one to exit the room was our lead investigator from the Austin area, Scott. As he turned around to leave, he was violently pushed out of the room from behind. Later, Paulina, another investigator, entered this room and was also pushed on the shoulder. After we left the residence, we listened back to the voice recorder from that part of the investigation. Right after Cara was scratched, there was a small child's voice was heard chanting the old familiar child's way of making fun of someone..."Na na na na na". This is the first physical experience I have ever had with a spirit. This house definitely has some negative energy in it! We are going to be returning to the residence in December for a follow-up investigation. Look on the home page for pictures from this investigation.
6/16/06
It's been awhile since I've had the time to post anything on here. In the last eight months since I've updated this page, there have been some changes to the group's dynamics. We have a LOT of new members from the Austin area...so many that I've appointed a new lead investigator from that area to help with the planning of investigations. We've also gotten a much improved message board that is really awesome. With all the changes and all the new members we've added, and all the people outside of this organization that I have talked to recently via email and out in public, I have had a fear enter my mind. It didn't help when yesterday, the car dealer I was working with called me a "Ghost Buster" to his wife on the phone. He wasn't trying to be ugly, but that is what a lot of the people in the general public think of us. I have the best group of investigators any founder could ask for! I think we are all in this for different reasons, but for the most part, I think we all want some sort of proof that there is more out there than can be seen with our regular senses. I also know that all of my members take what we do seriously and would never have joined the group if they thought it was all just fun and games like a 'spook house' at Halloween. I'm not afraid of my members thinking this way, but as you know, there are a lot of people out there who do. And I'm not talking about skeptics... I LOVE skeptics! I'm talking about those who are out there to make us look like idiots and who think we are idiots. Those same people are the ones who I'm afraid are going to be asking me if they can join the group because they want to poke fun and cause havoc on investigations. There are also those who watch the TV ghost hunting shows and think that if they join our group it is going to be just like that. We all know that ghost hunting is actually boring 90% of the time, but it's that 10% when we get something great that makes the other times worth it. Anyway, I'm rambling here I know. I have never worried about this before , I guess maybe because our group was relatively small, and I personally knew every one of of the members. But with the expansion of the group, and the branches we have in other cities, there are a lot of people out there that I talk to about joining that I have never met. I would hope that those who are skeptics will remain skeptical yet open minded. I would hope that those who don't believe in what we do would just let us go on about our business with no trouble. And I would hope that those who are true believers , like the great group of people I now have as members, would continue on their quest to find the truth. I know I shouldn't worry. So why DO we do what we do? I think I can speak for most of my group....everyone has their own personal reason for wanting to know what is out there, but the thing we all share is the belief that there IS something out there.... and we want to prove it to the rest of the world. One day we will, I believe that with all my heart.
June 25th, 2006
Up until now, our paranormal investigations have been strictly objective (with technical, recordable instrumentation. We have been lucky enough to have some great people join our group and we nowe occasionally ask these psychic members to come along with us to verify what we get with our technological equipment (photos, videos, EVP recordings, temperature readings, EMF data, etc...) but we have never really ever relied on the psychics or any of the other 'questionable' methods out there to prove that ghosts exist. I personally did not place must trust in a psychic reading but only because it is something that I could not prove. I had only seen "automatic writings" done a few times, and again, I had no way of knowing if what they were getting was truly a voice from the other side, or if they were just writing what others wanted to hear. But these last few months we have been lucky enough to get a chance to put all of these methods to the test and to use all three: technology, psychic intuition, and automatic writing: in conjunction with each other to figure out what or who is in a house. I know that there are many ghost hunting groups out there who would debunk any results found through the writings or the psychics. Again, I was the same way. But these last few months have been amazing. Let me explain exactly what we do, and I'll leave it to you to decide if you believe in any of it. I've seen it work too many times now to NOT believe!!!!!!
We have two "automatic writers" in our group. How does this work? These person will sit quietly with pen in hand , eyes closed, and focus. If they know a person's name, she will focus on that. Or in a situation where we are trying to find out the name, they just sit and wait for someone to come through. Eventually a spirit or 'ghost' will begin writing through her while the writer is just a passive medium through which they can communicate with the living. She will often get details such as names, dates, how a person died, why they stay in a certain location, what they want from us...pretty much just anything the spirit is willing to divulge. How do we know it's true? Until recently, I didn't have any way of knowing. I've personally let our writer do a writing for me and allowed me to speak to my grandmother who passed years ago. Our writer didn't know any details about her passing or anything else about her. Through the writings, my grandmother called me by my nickname that nobody else in the world knew and she told me things that only she and I knew. There is no way that our writer could have known any of this ahead of time. So in our investigations, we usually take the writers to the location without giving them any prior information about the haunting or the activity in that location. They come in, totally unaware of anything, and start getting names, ages, and other questions that we ask.
So what? That doesn't prove anything right? Well, step two. We also have one of the best psychics in this area in our group. Again, I have seen her at work, and she gets some really interesting visions and sensations at a location. She can pick up names, ages, a general idea of what happened in the house or location, and she easily picks up on the emotions of the spirits as well. Before now, I had nothing to compare her story to so I couldn't use it as "data" in an investigation. However, when this person comes in with no prior knowledge about the interview, and no prior knowledge about the writings that we have done at the location, yet she gets the exact same names, the exact same ages, dates, and details that our writers got.... to me it becomes a lot more credible! I have seen this time and time again, in situations where I KNOW for a fact that the two have had no communication and had no prior knowledge of anything about the situation. Once, maybe a coincidence...but when they have done this repeatedly, I have begun to take it much more seriously and I believe that yes...we CAN use this as documented evidence of paranormal activity.
But don't worry, we haven't gotten away from our original investigation procedures with our technological equipment. I am more on this end...the technical group. But instead of using equipment as our sole means of evidence...our tech team is now step three in an investigation. After the writers and the psychics have gotten their information, we come in and set up our equipment and do our usual investigation. This blows my mind some times. After getting the same name from a writer, the same name from a psychic, and then have that SAME name turn up on our EVP recordings. ....How can you NOT totally believe it? I don't think that any of these methods alone can be proof of anything, but when you get all three of these things in conjunction with each other, and we all get the same thing..... it's amazing.
Some may not agree and I don't blame them. I hate to say that I don't care what others think...but unless you have seen this happen, time and time again... I wouldn't expect you to believe it. Just keep an open mind and who knows.... this might be just the proof we have been looking for for years.
Sept.10th 2006
I've always been told that if you can't think of anything nice to say, just don't say anything at all....well.... I will try my hardest here to be "nice" about what I'm going to say. Forgive me if it comes out any other way! I just want to make a short comment here about my last posting above concerning the use of psychics in our investigations.
First of all...as I already stated above, we have not changed anything about our investigative techniques. 99% of our investigation data is based on our technical, objective data that comes from our equipment. We were just lucky enough to have these gifted individuals join our group, and even luckier to see them do such amazingly accurate work. Although the title of that posting ended with .."Proof?"... I in no way ever intended that to mean that a psychic IS in any way proof of the existence of something paranormal. We have experimented with using the psychics on investigations only to see if they happen to pick up, either before or after an investigation, the same things that our technical team picks up with their equipment. I don't see any reason to sit here and explain myself since anyone who is actually active in our investigations KNOWS how our investigations go.
If you or your group would like to sit back as an inactive, non-participant, and criticize our use of psychics on our investigations, I obviously can not stop you. You are entitled to your own opinions and I respect your opinions! I would most certainly NEVER go to YOUR other investigators in your group and try to convince them that this is not a legitimate group because you use a psychic. And that is ESPECIALLY TRUE if I had never personally gone along with you to see what goes on.
So, there it is. I tried my hardest to be nice. I hope you have your own set way of doing things and I hope it works for you. This is something we are experimenting with and having a good time with. Besides trying to prove that there are other aspects to life out there that we may not be able see, this is also about having a good time.
This was not intended to be offensive, but there are a certain few out there who will likely get offended, and you know who you are.
January 14th, 2008
I am almost ashamed that it has been so long since I added to my thoughts page. It is amazing how many things have changed… both in life and within our group. If you have visited the site prior to today, you might have noticed that our website has a new look. It’s a long story but it involved lightening, a computer, and an uneducated web designer (me). But I like the new site and I hope you have enjoyed it too.
Our group is still going strong… we have done some outstanding investigations that were never included on the website. (…remember the lightening issue?) Last year was a really bad year for me personally in many areas so we didn’t get to do as many investigations as I would have liked, but this year is proving to be much better and I am really excited about the upcoming changes within our group.
These changes I’m talking about within our group involve not only our investigations, but also our members. I guess I was pretty naďve when I started this group and thought that everyone out there who did this was really honestly interested in one thing…. trying to find evidence of the paranormal. Unfortunately, through these last few years I have learned the hard way that that is definitely not the case. There are three types of people that I have learned to look out for when managing a paranormal research group…. And I have dealt with them all!
I have found that almost half of those who contact me about joining my group are simply thrill-seeking adrenaline junkies. I want to tell those who are thinking about joining a group because you think it is scary and exciting every time…. “Think again”. Most of our investigations turn out to have a perfectly logical explanation for everything. There is a lot of sitting around and waiting for things that never happen. It’s just not as exciting as it appears on TV. (Don’t get me started there…maybe that will be my next post). The other types of people that I have come across are the fame-seekers. This annoys me even more. I realize that this is a full-time job…maybe even a LIFE…for some people. They are so caught up in the politics of who is the best, who has the most investigations, who can get in with TAPS, who has the best equipment, and who has their name in the paper most often that they forget what we are really doing this for. I started my group as a hobby. I take it seriously, don’t get me wrong, but I am a full time teacher and a full time mother, and this paranormal research is something that I do on the weekends with my group. To these people I would like to say, “CHILL out!!! You are more than likely NOT going to be on TV… you will NOT be famous, and you will NOT make much money doing this”. Don’t lose site of why you started this to begin with. There are plenty of groups out there who live and breathe the paranormal… CTGS is not one of them. We are highly respected professional investigators, but we do not take this to an extreme level. And finally, the last type of person that I have dealt with in this field is the faker. This, to me, is the very worst. There are those out there who can’t stand to sit around and be bored. They want to scare people and stir things up and will go to any lengths to convince the group that things are happening. If you start to notice one person reporting these ‘amazing’ things that are happening, but you notice that it’s always in a room with no cameras or other equipment, be careful. To those people I would like to say, “Find a new hobby. We don’t need you”.
I hate to sound negative on my first entry of 2008. I guess I’ve just gotten a little older and a little wiser and I want the best for my group. For those that are honestly into this only because you want to know the truth, you want to help and educate the public, and you know you will probably not be famous or even recognized for what you do….. thank you. You are the true paranormal investigators.